Freedom of Religion


Mar 09, 2018 #1

Let's be honest. Everyone thinks they have the truth. Some think the truth is that there is no truth, but that is "their truth", and anyone that does not agree is wrong. Live and let live? Show me someone who preaches that, I will show you that when pressed, he has clear lines of what others can do that is wrong even though it does not harm others (now there is a term which stretches the definition of it depending on your beliefs), and those others should not be let to continue. I am not here to debate why I know I am right in my beliefs. (By the way, I am happy to do it in another forum - no pun intended, or privately.) This is about being the most effective therapist to our clients who seek our help.

When someone comes to us for guidance, more often than not they are struggling with the concept of right and wrong. Either their actions, thoughts and feelings, or the actions, thoughts and feelings of others who have interacted with them. "It is not our job to judge." Really? Think about the entire concept validation. How can I as a therapist validate, or guide my client to validate him or herself, when I in actuality do not think their action/point of view etc. is valid? Check my personal beliefs at the door? Remember that lofty concept called TRUST, that is so vital to establish in the therapist/client relationship? Would you ever tell a client looking for understanding and validation "I personally believe your actions our reprehensible. As a matter of fact I teach my children to avoid acting in such a manner. But in this room as your therapist, I set aside my definition of right and wrong because that is my job." I doubt it. So much for integrity.

My solution? Only treat people with the same belief system that you have. Then you will be free to be honest, and to truly understand the moral struggles your client is facing, because they are SHARED. I hope to share soon some very meaningful experiences with my clients during IFS sessions to illustrate this point, with the focus here being on effectiveness.
Last edited by Zev on 7:50 PM - Apr 17, 2018, edited 2 times in total.